Outside the classroom, the weather is postcard perfect. The sky is an unbroken backdrop of blue. The radiant sun will wrap you in her warm and brilliant rays, but do not let it lull you to sleep. You must focus.

Let your eyes trail Mrs. Lou’s arms as she scrawls an equation across the chalk-filled blackboard.

Someone will burp. Hold your breath! Do not giggle. Notice how the classroom grows silent — do not be the one to break it. As Mrs. Lou whirls around in her black turtleneck and velvet ankle-length skirt, fold your arms atop the desk, straighten your back, and for God’s sake, stop tapping your left foot! 

“Karl?” Mrs. Lou drawls, “come up and solve this equation.”

Notice how it isn’t a question. It’s a command. But you will feel your shoulders slouch. At least you were not the victim this time. 

A warm breeze sweeps through the open windows and your baby hair glides across your forehead. You will risk a glance at the outer world. What a beautiful world it is! The trees move in harmony in the breeze.

Notice the flock of pigeons plunging across the sky. You envy them, their freedom. You will wish you could extend your limbs and float out the window, away from the classroom.

All of a sudden, some sixth sense will tell you that the room is unnaturally quiet. You will blink hard, twice, and snap back into focus.

Oh, crap.

Every pair of eyes, including Mrs. Lou’s, is trained upon you. Further, Mrs. Lou is struggling to breathe. She looks like she will have a stroke. Wait… No. She is seething with anger. You will feel your chest tighten.

This will be your second strike this week. One more, and you’ll end up on the Wall of Shame and be punished.

Mrs. Lou approaches your desk, her high heels clicking against the floor. "Why, Yijia, are you distracted yet again? Have you no respect for me? Your behavior and attitude are simply unbelievable!"

On and on and on she will go.

Remind yourself that you have a routine for this. Take deep breaths and try to block out the noise by conjuring Dorothy — the beautiful, brilliant heroine from the Wizard of Oz. Her bravery will give you strength.

Close your eyes if it becomes unbearable, but not for too long. Mrs. Lou might think you are belittling her. Instead, make direct eye contact every three to five seconds. Don't stare too deep into those black pupils, though, or you may lose it and cry.

As Mrs. Lou pauses to replenish her lungs with oxygen, you will command your mind to prolong the moment before she starts again. 

Then, you will yawn.

Oh, no. That was a mistake. A terrible one. You will freeze, your lips still slightly parted. 

Watch as Mrs. Lou’s lower lip quivers. Your brain will start racing with possibilities: detention? Standing in the corner until lunch? Copying a poem twenty times? 

“You will clean the bathroom after school,” Mrs. Lou whispers in a voice you have never heard before. It will send chills down your spine.

Someone gasps. You will gape at your teacher, staring into her eyes this time. You will want to cry out against the injustice… but think, Yijia! Remember what your mother taught you: always consider the consequences before you act. Crying would only aggravate Mrs. Lou further. Instead, bite your tongue, hard. You will taste blood.

After you have made peace with your emotions, give the slightest nod. Keep your head down and shoulders slightly hunched as Mrs. Lou towers over you. Let your body language convey that you have learned your lesson. You will hear her clicking heels retreat. Even with the unthinkable task ahead, you will feel a wave of relief wash over you, your muscles loosening on their own accord. 

When the bell rings, you will flee to your next class like the devil is chasing you.

Dreading the task ahead, you will act like the dead for the remainder of the school day, only awakening at the monotonous ding-dong of the dismissal bell. Notice how the faintest hint of a smile is starting to crawl on everyone’s faces. Reiterate your hatred for Mrs. Lou.

Hide in the storage room until you hear the last set of footsteps fade out of earshot. Then, slip back out. Let yourself tiptoe amongst the shadows. You’d make an amazing thief, you will think to yourself mournfully, except that instead of stealing a golden crown off some sleeping beauty’s head in a grand castle, you are on your way to the Hole, the not-so-endearing nickname for the restroom. Sigh noisily and curse Mrs. Lou again. 

Take a bucket and a mop from the janitor's room. Fill the bucket with clean water. Dip the mop in, wring it, and murmur a quick prayer before you enter the innermost stall. Now, tip-toe around the perimeter and edge your way to the flushometer.

If you hear a funny, squishy noise beneath your shoe, do not freeze. Your eyes will have the urge to wander, a natural instinct, but you must keep them trained to the opposite stall door. If you risk a glance downwards, you are done for. The endless surprises never fail to make you gag.

Once you’re within range, grasp the handle, place one hand on top of the other, and give a little jump. After you hear the initial flushing die down, count to five, and push again. 

You will feel your shoulders loosen. The worst part is over. Now, take the mop and wipe away at the floor while still keeping your eyes level. Avoid the corners if you can. That is janitor territory. Make your cautious exit when your arm muscles start to strain. Rinse the mop and watch the bucket become a bowl of brown, mushy soup.

You will feel your stomach churn. Clasp your throat after gulping down some bile. Collapse against the stall door for support and let your trembling hands reach into your jacket pocket. Like a miracle, you will find a handful of candy. Stuff as many as you can into your mouth and chew. Utilize those strong, healthy teeth that are the result of relentless parental supervision. Let the sweetness override the queasiness.

As black dots disappear from your vision, you will sigh and proceed to the next stall.  

A century later, you will finally exit the last stall. Your prayer must have been heard; you made it through unscathed. You will hum to yourself, even waltz a little. All of a sudden, your shoe will lose its traction and squeal, knocking over the bucket of liquid. You will sense your neck muscles strain as you fall, powerless against gravity. Hands flailing, you will land on your back.

Oh, no.

Check if any bones have cracked. Try moving your hands, arms, legs. You will feel dizzy. Is it from the fall or from the stench?

Wearily haul yourself to your feet. Your back is soaked, but you will be too stunned to even open your mouth. Be glad that nothing is going to come out. 

Go ahead and trudge towards the sink. Wash your hands and arms with clean water. The rest will have to wait. Notice how your tartan collared shirt is stained a grizzly-bear brown.

Sink your teeth into your bottom lip and recall your favorite book, The Wizard of Oz, again. You are the good-hearted heroine, Dorothy, being held against your will in a foreign land (the bathroom, and it’s not so foreign), wishing to return home. Of course there are trials along the way! But if Dorothy can make it through in one piece, so can you, Yijia. So quit standing there like you are waiting to catch a cold and tidy up this mess you have created. After that, race back home.

Your mom will open the door and stare like you just came back from the depths of Hell. You won’t be ready to be bombarded with questions, so push past her and head straight for the bathroom. Turn the lever handle. Water will pour into the bathtub with a roar like a miniature waterfall. You’ve always disliked the noise, but at that moment, you will embrace it. You will step in it. The sizzling bathwater extinguishes the blazing fire in your heart, but you will cry anyway.

Bitterly realize that, like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, you must avenge your woes. But how? Though Mrs. Lou is human, she still exceeds you in power and strength. Wait… How did Dorothy do it? Oh yes, she threw a bucket of water at the Witch, who melted afterward…

That’s it! A bucket of water! 

With that, a plan forms in your mind. It will thrill you to the core. After years of suppression, it’s finally time for a nice little revolt. First, you will need to gather some supplies.