“Good morning,” called Joshua as he opened the kitchen door. 

“Hey, Buckwheat!” answered Davy, who was reading the comics page of the newspaper. “Did you run over here?” 

Joshua nodded. “Mom sent me over to pick up her car. It was a good opportunity to get in a run.” 

“Shoot,” said Davy. “I would have brought it over.” 

“I know. That's why she sent me,” Joshua replied as he opened the cupboard to get a glass. “What's this?” he asked as he pulled out a bottle to read the label. “’Auntie Maggie's Remedy’?” 

Davy glanced up at the bottle. “Yep. That's an old family recipe that Mom brews every now and again. Dad says it's guaranteed to never fail.”   

“Pretty potent stuff, huh?” Joshua replied as he placed it back in the cupboard. “So what's new?” he asked Davy. 

“Not much,” said Davy as he picked up a black magic marker. “Yvette and I have dental appointments this morning.” 

“That's nice,” said Joshua. “I had one a couple weeks ago.” 

Davy scoffed. “Yeah, but it figures that mine would be scheduled on the same day we have off school for a teachers workshop.” 

Just then Davy's, father and mother walked into the kitchen. “Oh, good morning, Joshua,” said Hiram, Davy’s dad. “Here to pick up the car?” 

“Yep,” replied Joshua as he took another sip of water.  “Is it all set?” 

Hiram plopped his huge frame down at the kitchen table and picked up the newspaper. “Yep. I changed the oil and took a look at the other fluids. It's good to go.” 

Just then, Yvette walked into the kitchen. “Mom, can I borrow your car? Please? Dad's still working on mine.” 

“No,” replied Mollie. “You'll just have to ride with Davy.” 

“Seriously?” Yvette whined. “Dad, can I borrow your car instead?”  

“No,” replied Hiram without looking up from his newspaper. 

“Can I borrow the tow truck then?” Yvette pleaded. 

 “No,” her parents said in unison. 

“I don’t want to ride with her,” Davy chimed in. “Make her walk instead,” he added as he colored a rubber band with the marker. 

“No,” Mollie said firmly. 

“Besides,” grunted Hiram, “It won't kill either of you to spend ten minutes in the same car together. You're only going to the dentist.”   

Yvette blanched. “I'd rather walk than ride in that death trap he drives.” 

“I'd rather you walk than ride with a death trap like you,” retorted Davy as he busied himself at the kitchen sink. 

“Oh yeah? Give me one good reason why I should ride in your car.” 

“Because it runs,” sneered Davy. 

“Knock it off, you two. Here, eat your breakfast,” said Mollie as she poured cereal and milk into some bowls.  “Joshua, would you like some, too?” 

“Yes, please,” said Joshua with a smile. 

“What kind of cereal is this?” demanded Davy, pointing at his bowl as he sat down. 

“It's called bran flakes,” replied his mother testily. “It's good for you.” 

Davy glared at the bowl. “How good can it be if it doesn't turn the milk purple?” 

“Oh, quit your grousing,” said Mrs. Odell. “Look, Joshua is eating it.” 

Davy looked at Joshua, who looked back at him while chewing his cereal. “That's because he doesn't know any better,” said Davy. 

Joshua nearly spit out his cereal trying not to laugh. 

“Look on the bright side,” added Yvette. “At least it's not oatmeal.” 

“Blech,” said Davy, sticking out his tongue in disgust. “That stuff stinks.” 

“It probably wouldn't have if you hadn't dumped it down the furnace duct,” Yvette shot back. 

Hiram looked at the furnace grate in the floor. “Oh, great. Just what I need.” 

“Come on, let's get this over with,” said Davy as he got up from the table. “Brush your teeth and bustle your buns out to the car so I can catch up on the latest adventures of The Timbertoes.” 

“Hold your horses,” scolded Yvette. “Let me get a drink of water first,” she added as she grabbed a glass from the cupboard.   

Yvette positioned it under the faucet and turned it on— only to get soaked. The rubber band that Davy had wrapped around the faucet spout sprayed water everywhere. 

“DAVY!” shrieked Yvette, grabbing a dish towel to whip at him. 

“OH YEAH? I'LL SHOW YOU!” Davy shouted back, swatting at her with a magazine.   

They chased one another around the table, shouting and lunging at each other. Finally, Yvette ran out the door with Davy in hot pursuit.   

“Oh, those two,” grumbled Hiram. “What's the matter with them?” 

Joshua glanced out the kitchen window. “They're going to be late if they keep that up,” he said as he watched them chase each other around the yard. 

Mollie buried her face in her hands and sighed.  “Joshua, dear, try to do something with him, would you?”

Joshua was at Karen's house later that day. He was sitting at the kitchen table when he told Karen and her sister Kara about Davy and Yvette. 

“So you had to drive them to the dentist?” asked Kara as she read a magazine. 

 Joshua nodded. “Yeah, they were too busy fighting to drive over there themselves.” 

“Well,” mused Karen, “at least you got in some extra running time.” 

“I didn't want to drive Davy's car any further than I had to,” laughed Joshua. 

Just then Davy burst through the kitchen door. “IT'S NOT FUNNY!” hollered Davy. 

“Oh yes it is!” cackled Yvette as she walked in behind Davy. 

“What?” asked Joshua. 

Yvette laughed and clapped as she sat down at the kitchen table. “This is just too rich! Wait until you hear this!” 

“What's so funny?” asked Karen. 

“Go on!” Yvette prodded gleefully. “Tell them! Tell them!” 

Davy sighed and grumbled, “I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled. 

As soon he said this, Yvette burst out laughing again. 

“Oh yeah?” said Davy as he sat down next to Yvette.  “You wouldn't be laughing if it was YOU!” 

“Oh yeah?” Yvette shot back. “You shouldn't have laughed at me when I had to have braces!” 

Davy waved a fist in her face. “And it will have been a total waste of money if you don't knock it off, Miss Metal Mouth!” 

“When do you have to have them pulled?” Karen asked Davy. 

“Next Monday,” grumbled Davy. 

“Good luck!” said Kara from behind her magazine.  “You'll need it!” 

“And it can't come soon enough!” teased Yvette.  “Oooooooh, I can hardly wait!” she added, rubbing her hands together as she relished the thought.   

“I'll bet,” said Davy. “No wonder you placed last in the Miss Tin Grin pageant.” 

“HA! I hope you suffer!” Yvette continued. “I hope you get dry socket! I hope your cheeks get all puffed up! You'll look like a chipmunk—like this!” she prattled, puffing up her cheeks. 

“Knock it off, you former metal mouth!” shouted Davy. 

Yvette continued to laugh and giggle. “Once they pull your wisdom teeth, you won't have any brains left!” 

“MOM!” Davy hollered. “Yvette's picking on me!” 

“HA!  Mom's not here.” 

“I know, but I like to practice.” 

“Suck it up, Davy,” Yvette snickered. 

“Oh yeah? Well, in that case...” Davy punched Yvette on her shoulder. 

“OUCH!  What did you do that for?” 

“Because Mom's not here,” Davy replied. 

Yvette returned the punch as she got up from the table.  “I can hardly wait!” she said again as she opened the kitchen door to leave. “I'm going to have SO much fun!” 

“Yeah yeah, it's gonna be all Polka Dots and Moonbeams,” grumbled Davy as Karen's parents, Carl and Annie, came into the kitchen.   

“What's all the ruckus about?” asked Carl as he poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down. 

“Davy has to have his wisdom teeth pulled,” explained Joshua. 

“Think that will do any good?” asked Carl. 

Kara shook her head. “Probably not,” she quipped from behind her magazine. 

“Ha, ha, ha,” grumbled Davy as he swiped Carl's cup of coffee. “That was so funny I almost forgot to laugh.” 

“I think you will be fine,” said Annie to Davy. “I had to have mine pulled when I was about your age. It wasn't so bad. I had a bit of swelling for a day or two, and that was about it for me.” 

     “My brother didn't fare so well,” Carl said. “He suffered miserably for a week.” 

“Thanks. That makes me feel better,” Davy said sarcastically. He slid the coffee cup back to Carl. Then he stood up and glanced out the kitchen window. “OH MAN!  Yvette stole my car! Hey, Buckwheat, give me a ride?” 

“Sure, I can do that,” replied Joshua getting up from the table. “I'll see you this evening,” he said to Karen. 

She gave him a quick kiss behind her father's back. “Sure thing!” she replied. They glanced over at Kara, who gave them a wink and a smile of approval. 

"You know what really sucks about all this?” whined Davy. 

“No, what?” replied Joshua as he shifted gears. 

“It's bad enough that I have to have my wisdom teeth pulled, but it's even worse that I have to have it done on a Monday.” 

Joshua nodded in agreement.  “Rough way to start off your week.” 

“Yeah, well, Monday wouldn't be so bad if it came on a Friday.” 

“Look on the bright side,” said Joshua. “At least you'll have a couple days off from school for it.” 

Davy blanched at the idea. “Except I won't get to do anything fun. Hey, while we're in the area, swing by the town cemetery for me, would you?” 

Joshua accommodated Davy's request. He took a right turn down the road toward the cemetery. “Why do you want to go by the cemetery?” 

“So I can check my mail,” said Davy.   

Joshua came to a stop in front of the mailbox, and Davy began to remove the contents. “Nope, nothing good today,” he quipped as he sifted through the mail. 

As Joshua pulled away, he asked, “Why are you getting mail at the town cemetery?” 

“I set up a mailbox here so I can get Nude Volleyball Magazine without Mom finding out.” 

“All that just for a magazine?” 

“Yeah. Otherwise she'll cancel my subscription again,” said Davy as he glanced through a flyer. “I get a lot of junk mail addressed to ‘Current Resident,’ too. It's amazing how much mail dead people receive.” 

Joshua thought about this. “It certainly gives new meaning to the dead letter office.”